Thursday, April 16, 2009

Miss Maddie

I only met Maddie once - several months ago at a movie with my friend Nanette, who is close to Heather. We only chatted for a few moments - the film was about to start and I was juggling my infant who was hoping to eat before the lights went down. I was excited to meet them though - I had visited Heather's blog several times and was inspired by Maddie's story.

As Heather came in to the theater, she plopped Maddie down in Nanette's lap and snatched Nanette's new baby Em up for a kiss and snuggle. Maddie was so tiny - probably smaller than Ben was at the time (about 10 weeks) - and she was so cute! Those big eyes - that grin...she just hung out, looking around, taking it all in and charming the pants off anyone that caught her eye.

That day stuck with me, and, as I learned of Maddie's illness last week, followed Heather's tweets and then, learned of her passing the next day, I was devastated - distracted for the rest of the day, which I spent glued to the blogs and Twitter, trying to find out what had happened...looking for any sort of update. I've followed the updates and posts from Heather's wonderful friends, and from Heather and Mike themselves - as I read more and more, and my eyes fill with tears each time, I realize why this silly blogging is so important. It keeps people connected, creates an outlet and provides support in ways that I don't think anyone really expected. I think that the support and love for Heather, Mike and Maddie demonstrates just how much good there is in this world, and it is heartwarming and inspiring.

To Heather and Mike - my heart goes out to you both in the loss of your precious Maddie. I can't imagine what you are going through - but know that I'm thinking of you every day, that you are in my prayers and that we all miss Maddie, your little angel.


I've been toying with starting a blog for a while now. At first I thought that it wasn't worth it - I'd never post, that it would be a chore and that ultimately, I'd let it drop. These things may still happen; however, it has been on my mind more and more lately - so I decided to go for it and see if I enjoy it. Potential posts have started writing themselves in my head lately and I need a place for them to go.

I'm hoping this blog provides me a creative outlet - far away from the rigid, AP style-regulated healthcare writing that makes up my work day.

I have two sons - Jackson is nearly 4 and Benjamin is 6 months. I've been married over 6 years to my best friend, Michael, and we live in Southern California. I've lived here all my life.

I work in healthcare communications for a company that is based in another city. I work from my dining room. My days are spent on conference calls, email and chasing my cat off the keyboard before she deletes whatever brilliance I just created.

The title of this blog is something that I hear 8,000 times a day. Conversations with my oldest son, Jackson (nearly 4) go something like this:
Jack: Momma?
Me: Yes buddy?
Jack: I gotta tell you something...

Keep in mind, this is how he starts every new sentence - even when we are sitting in the same room (or car) and having an ongoing conversation. It is like he feels the need to grab my attention every 2 seconds, which , now that I think about it, probably isn't far off. Hmmm.

My boys are amazing - Jack is known for his one-liners and sensitive nature (as well as his appetite). He's obsessed with Transformers and The effing Justice League, and knows how to guilt me into just about anything. Benny is chubby, happy and laid-back - he loves nothing more than to get ahold of his toes and try to shove them in his mouth, something he's becoming more and more skilled at. The only thing tastier than toes is his beloved sweet potatoes. Yummm.

I think that is it for tonight - the bed is calling (the hubs is out partying - a rarity) so I'm going to take advantage of the quiet and zonk out. Hope to be back soon!